How to start a habit with a healthy attitude ~ Have you ever wondered about your attitude to habits and where it came from?
We do want healthy habits. Even if we resist, start, then fail to keep going. Yes, we feel guilty but we still want the healthy habit and might try again. What is your relationship with the word HABIT?
For me, habit is an emotionally loaded word. Of course, I’ve no idea how I came to feel this way. I’ve tried to call them rituals, but I still know it’s that dreaded ‘H’ word.
Deep down I’m rebellious and think good habits are easy for organised, sensible people who always like to do the right thing. I’m creative, experimental and contrarian. Habits, me? I do brush my teeth and have good skincare [ritual] I TRY to drink enough water etc. But secretly I want simple ways to make life easier by creating healthy habits that support me. Without having to use SO much willpower and motivation.
First I need a new healthy attitude towards habits.
I thought about my attitude. I decided to have fun and I’ve given some “new habit scenarios” a nickname and personalities so I recognise when I’m reacting or other people are giving me their two cents worth. I made a list of associations to the word habit and my own fears. It’s a bit of fun but maybe an element of truth.
Of course, I had to also create a new ‘healthy perspective mantra’ on the word habit at the end. I guarantee this will be a work in progress. The last one at the bottom of the page might help you if you’re like me and need an attitude adjustment.
The new habit, baby steps.
Starting from scratch feels like I’m learning to walk just like a baby. Instinctively I want to try out what the giants in the room are doing with ease. I take my first steps, get the wobbles and land on my bottom. Everyone thinks, oh, isn’t that cute, and someone in the room takes a photo of me for Facebook. While the lovely mothers scoop me up in case, I’m upset or embarrassed.
The guilty habit.
A habit I should adopt, I feel bad even before I fail to keep it. A [habit] someone else tells me to do because it’s the right thing or right for me. It feels like I’m wearing a hair shirt and can’t wait to run away and take it off.
The bestie habit.
OMG! You totally need to do this too! “Really?” I say. Well maybe, but I’m going to watch you first and see how that pans out before I invest my money, time or headspace. You go for it though”, I say with my eye’s rolling back in my head.
The bad habit.
Interesting little devils. When I want to swap a [habit] that I don’t like anymore and upgraded to better one, my old habit starts reacting like a jealous lover. Telling me how much I will miss it when it’s gone. They follow me around like a google ad and show up everywhere.
The new habit declaration.
Oh, that was a big mistake! Anyone would think I was announcing to everyone “I’m moving to India” ~ All I hears is…”You’re going to DO WHAT!!! are YOU serious? It’s ridiculous – you cant do that, I’ve never heard you say anything so stupid before! That’s the last [habit] on earth I would ever do!!!
The traditional habit.
Hey [people] I got this great idea for a new [habit] it might be a better way to [add non-traditional habit] hold your breath and wait for it…
“Darling, we do it this way, our; [family, workplace, club, heritage] have been doing this for […], and this is what WE do. Don’t rock the boat/house/group. We like to do it this way, well, just because we all do. There’s a good girl. Let’s talk about this later/another time/never.”
The mother of all habits.
Trained by the resident expert on all imposed [habits] before you had any power [not necessarily your real mother probably a narcissistic boss/control freak colleague]
“I’ve shown you how to do this [habit], and now you will do it. It’s good for you and all of us. If you don’t do this [habit], you can go to your room, without dinner. You’re grounded for a month, or I will take away your phone and… wait till your father comes home. End of story. Got it! Just do it. You’re fired!
The busy habit
I’m far too busy to try something new, I got this to do, and this, and this. And don’t forget I have to do that. It’s just silly to think I have time to learn how to make a new habit. Everyone needs me, and when you’re as busy as me, it’s not possible. I will think about it in fifteen years.
The attached habit.
I don’t know how or where I adopted this habit. Maybe it was lost on the street, and I just took it home. We’ve been together for years, and we have bonded. Even though I want to go to Paris with my new [habit], I don’t know how I could leave my attached habit. My friends are all encouraging me to go and even offer to look after my attached [habit] for me. I don’t know; it’s so hard, what would you do?
This is the end to my list… Did I leave any out? Do you have a reaction to the word habit?
At last! My new beautiful affirmation of the word habit. After all its just a little word and rhymes with rabbit. It deserves a better.
The healthy habit.
It’s a new choice and it’s not a big deal. I know it may feel wobbly. But have a spark of excited anticipation and hope it will be a good fit for the life I want to create. I’m not announcing it to the world; instead, I will start quietly, keep it simple and I will be consistent. If anyone questions me, I will shrug and say’ Oh its just a little experiment. If my new way all works well, people will eventually accept this is just what I do. My power partners are fantastic and have my back. They encourage me to keep going and are excited for me too.
It’s a new day, to make a new way. Bring it on sister!